May 22, 2016 · 10:09 am
To the brink of tears over this devilish concept time
yet it is as concrete as mathematical equations
(perhaps a parallel universe where time actually does stand still exists)
Live in the moment we say to our ADD brains
and sometimes we do
These days it does not compute
The clock is spinning and there is a lump in my throat,
heaviness in my heart
from all these sunrises and sunsets seemingly happening within seconds of each other
And I am not getting younger
and neither are you
I don’t like it like this
I need space and freedom and time
time to just sit with you
and watch the tops of the trees
time to breathe
to just be.
image courtesy of pretzellogic.org
May 15, 2016 · 9:59 am
For years I’ve had a recurring dream starring Keanu Reeves.
In the dream I am trying to get to him, trying to get his attention. We are usually surrounded by people at some event. They crowd around him like a Kool blockade I can’t quite permeate.
Who are these seemingly so important people keeping him engaged in their uppity conversation when all I want to do is have him glance in my direction so he can be lured by my humble eyes and kind smile?
I wake up feeling failed and lost. Once again, he doesn’t come to me. Doesn’t even look my way. There are no engaging exchange of words between us. No hand on shoulder. No walking off into the sunset.
Until last night. And the one a few months ago.
He finally looked away from his entourage long enough to see me among the bloodsuckers. He smiled at me. We danced like goofy kids underneath a string of glowing white party lights.
Last night we actually talked. We laughed like old friends catching up after too many years apart. And we embraced just the same.
I woke up with a happy, peaceful smile underneath the crisp bed sheets.
Dreams are the brain’s way of disecting our waking problems, make sense of them and problem solve. Although sometimes in their wake we are left feeling more confused.
Maybe Keanu represents my self-confidence. And now I am finally gaining ownership of it. Maybe he represents my fears and how I’ve begun to face and live with/overcome many of them. Or maybe Keanu just represents himself because I’ve had a celebrity crush on him since 1988.
Either way it was so refreshing to wake up feeling the happy ending to a too-long unresolved story. And being hugged by Keanu Reeves was pretty freakin excellent.
Keanu Reeves Hollywood 12/2000 By Armando Gallo
Do you have any recurring dreams? What are your interpretations? I’d love to hear your story…
May 2, 2016 · 10:31 pm
In the quiet
the quiet of the solitary evening
my ears are laid to rest
I do not have the usual music playing
to remind me
to inspire me
Instead there is stillness
a slight hum from the motherboard
a distant helicopter buzzing east
I cup my left ear to hear the sounds in the proposed silence
and they are magnified
almost sound as if a hundred crickets are singing me to sleep
This absence of noise is welcome
my ears need a break
my mind needs space
my heart needs to feel, ache, mend, hope.